Day 2 at the hospital and things are looking a little more complicated than we hoped. They think that his right kidney may have gotten bruised (which is apparently common) so we may be in here a little longer than my overly optimistic prediction of two days. Today he woke up and looked like the stay puff marshmallow man so we just hooked him back up to his machine.
Sometimes because he looks so normal, you play this mind game with yourself, maybe the doctors are wrong, maybe his kidneys started to work, and with every surgery, maybe this will be what fixes everything, and it will all go back to normal—-but seeing him today made me realize all over again how sick he is.
I know that I have to come to terms with all this, and for the most part, most days I am, but it just keeps happening. It’s still happening, over and over, and when your kid is sick, you just can’t function. Even when Lauren is sick, it’s like the world stops until she is better. And THIS is like a whole new level of sick. There are always like a million doctors around and none of them can do a darn thing to make him better, to fix him. I can’t wait until this hospital stay is over, and we get our happy, giggly, curious baby boy back. Time stands still here, it’s like it sucks out the world and you exist in this new hospital world, it’s weird.
Anyway, I am going to get back to Gavs, hopefully I will find some time to sneak away and give some more updates. Your comments and guestbook entries really help liven up our spirits. It helps to know there are an army of people out there thinking of him and wishing him well. I think Charlie Brown’s Thanksgiving is on, so Gavs may get his first dose of Charlie Brown!
That hospital living really is like living in a whole other dimension. My husband and I call it living in “hospital time.” I know this is a really old post but most of the stuff you are writing about I’m nodding my head to. I understand so much of it. It’s nice that your son was born on the same day as my son because I can correlate the ages to the months. If he wasn’t born on the same day my poor, sleep deprived brain wouldn’t be able to take it. Darn feeding tubes came deformed and make our machine beep like every 20 mins saying “No food.” Poor feeding machine has had some obscene words and threats to it recently.