At my friends Rachel and KJ’s wedding, their priest talked about children (don’t ask me what they said at mine, I was trying not to trip), and he said that your children are a mixture of all the good things about each of you. Kind of like a little perfect recipe where you get to shake in all the things that you love about each other. I look at Lauren and Gavin and I see perfection. I see these two little intelligent minds with laughter and energy, and just the right amount of sass. It makes me want to laugh more, take chances, become smarter…just be better. On the mom-o-meter, I got an “ok” ranking today. Lauren has taken to grading my daily performance as a mother (brutally honest). I have learned, however, that there is a significant grading curve on days where chips, fruit snacks and play dates are concerned, so I try to throw these in when I have less than stellar moments. I think that I am trying to challenge myself to actually live a little freer, to allow myself to be less than perfect, laugh without inhibition, say what I mean, and be a little kinder than necessary — because those are the things that I want my babies to be.

Gavin is now saying “da-da-da”. It’s his first multi-syllable word, so that is HUGE and very exciting. Now I know for sure that God is a man, because all babies seem to say “dada” first. This is despite the fact that we are the ones lugging them around in our bellies for nine months (which I am still somewhat convinced that it is actually ten months: 40 wks, 4 weeks in a month, but whatever). He is still eating despite his nighttime supplements, so that is nice. I think that he would sit in his high chair all day and eat if we let him. He tried an oreo blizzard today and LOVED it. Cookie smeared all over his face, it was adorable!—(of course, right?) He’s trying to figure out how to transition from a sitting up position down to his tummy, then hanging out and playing on his tummy! And the kid is always talking business, apparently he has a lot of opinions as well, and is ready for us to hear all of them (:

Lauren is recovering from all the fundraisers this weekend. She went to the Fireman’s dinner with Jay and the Jim Gill concert with me and had a BLAST! I think she may have run a mini toddler marathon between the two, and is a little tired from both. They were both wonderful!

Throughout all of this, we have seen such kindness; such support that simply saying “Thank you” just doesn’t seem enough. But until I can think of something better, it will have to do. Thank you to our families, friends, and strangers who have come to help, love, and support us!

I have to get to bed, but I will leave you with Lauren’s cell phone conversation today:

Lauren: “uh huh uh huh uh huh” (pause) “Okay.”
Me: “Lauren, who are you talking to?”
Lauren: (covers phone receiver with her hand) “Excuse me.” (slightly annoyed look at me) “I am on the phone with Rosie the horse in unicornland.”
(Lauren gets back into make believe phone conversation)
Lauren: “Please tell her not to eat all the carrots because I would like some, and to look out for shooting stars”. (Click)
Me: “Did Rosie say that was okay?”
Lauren: “She wasn’t there, so I left her a voicemail.”

Jill

“When you are going through hell…keep on going”, I believe it was Churchill who said that, and we made it. It was when I was grocery shopping, trying to figure out which was hotter the mild or medium salsa, when I realized that it’s all what you make of it. This of course was when I realized I was upset at the label makers of a salsa company (talk about sweating the small stuff, but seriously, what was wrong with mild and hot—it made it easier—what is medium all about?), but it all gives you perspective. We are still in a battle for a different home dialysis machine, but as Jay reminds me “control the controllables” (we can see who is the level headed one is here…me???).

Gavin seems to be doing so much better with the added nutrition at night. So much so, that it makes the night time easier and the added food means he’s not waking up. So we are getting a full night’s sleep, except when his dialysis machine alarms. Somebody should really tell you that after you have kids you’ll never sleep through the night ever again, it should be in like a pregnancy pamphlet.

I’ve gotten much better with the feeding tube and have learned some tricks to try to keep it in longer. He is also teetering on 16 lbs (15 lbs 14 oz)!!!!!! You look at him and you figure he’s got to be like twenty pounds with those cheeks and that belly, but not quite yet. Soon we will be at 22 pounds, and then there is no stopping us. We most definitely will be celebrating when that happens! I can’t believe in just shy of a week, he’s gained so much weight. I am so enthused by that!

He also seems to be moving so much more, even he is impressed by himself and has taken to clapping for himself once he accomplishes a new feat! He’s all about “Roly Poly” and bubbles and has so many more opinions now, mostly, “let me at ‘em”. He seems so much more age appropriate, no longer an infant but a little boy. I can’t believe he is almost one!

Lauren has learned the words “suction” and “flabbergasted” and I love making her use them. It’s so funny to hear them come out of her mouth. She has also learned how to spell her name in “sing song” so it’s pretty cute. We are starting to try to teach “the Gavinator” (as she likes to call him now) how to sign.

I signed Lulu up for four year old kindergarten this week for the upcoming school year…I can’t believe that she is going to go to school. Now I know why you see all the moms peering through windows trying to get a glimpse of their babies. She is such a proud big sister that she insists that we write her name and then also add “Big Sissy”. They both helped me make some Valentine cupcakes this week, and Gav loves the beater just like his sissy!

Hope this finds you all well! Something about pink, red and hearts that has to bring a smile to your face!

Jill